Welcome to the world of Swifty Morgan.

I AM Swifty Morgan, Twenty years experience at the game of life, currently enrolled in college.

This is my world.

I recently got a new job. I am an RA for a dorm that shall remain nameless at a university that shall remain nameless.

This past week has been training from 8:00a to 8:00p or later each day. Lots of policies and emergency procedures to remember.

I am really good at tornado and fire alarms.

One of the highlights of my training was the suicide awareness simulation.

In this simulation an RA was asked to be an actor and another RA was asked to be the RAOC (Resident Assistant On Call).
The RAOC is doing rounds and hears someone crying, naturally she opens the door and finds (we will call her) Jane, sitting alone, obviously upset.
Eventually RAOC finds out that Jane's boyfriend had broken up with her. After just completing suicide awareness training RAOC decides to assess Jane for signs of suicde.
When it comes to ending your life the RAOC doesn't beat around the bush, RAOC asks "[JANE], have you thought about ending it all?" The question is only part of why it was funny.
The question was asked like a salesman. "Why sir, have you considered the new Ford Focus?" Almost a suggestive, why don't you try this, type of question.

Anyway, suicide is no joke, lots of paperwork.

Welcome again to the life of Swifty Morgan.

As I go further in my job I will have PLENTY of other stories of unnamed students (and RA's) doing crazy things.

-Swifty Morgan