Tuesday, September 27, 2011

"That didn't go over as well as I thought it would"

I don't write this blog folks, it writes itself. That's right. I just transcribe actual events onto the internet:
The following took place this last Monday in my English class in college.

It was another somewhat entertaining day in English today as we were talking about ancient rhetorics and how they can be found in the writings of today. My teacher was busy using the overhead projector computer display to search for proverbs on the internet. Not proverbs like the book of proverbs in the Bible, you don't need to look for it, you should know where that is, in the Bible. Anyway, she was looking for those catchy little sayings like 'An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure', 'An apple a day keeps the doctor away' and so on and so forth. Well a kid in my class all of a sudden just jolted up and said "I HAVE A GOOD RELIGIOUS PROVERB! CAN I GOOGLE IT?!"....
This guy totally interrupted the teachers train of thought and took the entire class off guard.
"Well, um, ok, I guess so" said my teacher rather flustered.
By the time she got to the um the boy had already jumped from his seat and was a few strides away from the computer.

He quickly got to the google website and this is where things got interesting.
The kid clicked on google images. As most people know you NEVER do a LIVE google images search in front of a class. No matter what you type in there is always something awkward that will appear on screen and embarrass you. This kid didn't know that....
He  typed in "Odin ice giant" into the search bar and clicked the search button with the same great enthusiasm that he started with.

This was the picture he clicked on:
A rather interesting proverb indeed. In case the link breaks with the picture the quote says 'Jesus promised the end of all wicked people. Odin promised the end of all ice giants. I don't see many ice giants around'

I have no idea how this is a proverb.
To make it better the kid turned and looked at the class with this huge "I AM AWESOME" grin.
Nobody said anything or laughed at all.
Next he said "Well that didn't go over like I thought it would"

This statement got many more laughs than did his funny picture. I kinda felt bad for the kid but hey, this is college now, you can't do this kind of nonsense and expect people to always laugh to be nice.

The teacher continued by saying 'Well, um, cool" and then going back to her google search.

Just another day in Swifty Morgan's neighborhood.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Yes, it is okay to talk to girls.

Here in my dorm we have a tornado drill at the beginning of each semester. The noise is insanely loud and goes on and on for several minutes. Basically on my guys wing the 2 wings above us drop down into our hallway and sit in our hall. My guys get to chill in their bathrooms because the bathrooms are not on the exterior part of the building. The wing above us is girls and they come sit in the hallway during the drill. And after the tornado drill I had the funniest conversation with a student.
Me: Congrats, you guys survived the tornado, any questions about the procedures?
Student: "yeah, so we just go in the bathroom?"
Me: Yup you just go in the bathroom, it is great because it is probably quieter in the bathroom and also not as crowded as the hall way.
Student: Who comes to our wing anyway?
Me: A mix of seniors, both boys and girls.
Student: So senior girls come down here?
Me: Yes...
Student: So....
Me: Are you asking if it is okay for you to go outside and sit by the senior girls?
Student: I guess so.
Me: Yes, if you want to meet girls during a tornado be my guest.

Only time will tell if sitting by girls during tornado drills can get you a date.