Sometimes my residents like to live life on the edge. Push the limits a little bit and see what they can and cannot get away with...
In my unnamed dorm it is against policy to walk around without a shirt. For the girls floors this is a rule for obvious reasons but the guys with community bathrooms like to walk around without a shirt.
How did I work to curb this less than modest behavior?
Step one: Threaten to take your shirt off as well. Most residents think this would be an awful event and thus somehow seem to find a shirt right away.
Step two: Ask them to remember their shirt and inform them that the girl RA's and staff are fairly grossed out. Hopefully this will curb any desire to impress us, because if they are trying to impress the male staff on my floor we have other issues than walking around with no shirt on.
Step three: Inform them that they must now wear a shirt from this exact moment on or they will be documented.
Step four: The time to doc is always inconvenient. I think the residents plan it this way. They know when I am running late to a test and don't have much time to write out an information report. Let me tell you something, I have fingers of lightning, and a memory better than most. Lastly, I ENJOY writing reports, I get to write in third person and what not. Very fun stuff we are talking about here.
Here is an example of how I like to write my reports:
The most cunning and intelligent Resident Assistant Swifty Morgan attempted to shoot down three Russian fighter jets that were en route to UNNAMED RESIDENCE HALL with an anti-aircraft gun. At approximately 3:15pm the anti-aircraft gun jammed and RA Morgan effectively removed the three fighter jets with a yo-yo and a few crayola markers from UNNAMED airspace above UNNAMED hall.
Yeah folks, my reports are THAT COOL, and I NEVER exaggerate the story. Those planes were really Russian, not some Libyan nationalist wannabes.
Anyway, after I document you for no shirt, it would be unwise for you to walk around the hall shirtless. And when I see you and you run, I just laugh, mission accomplished, maybe now you realize that shirts are a good thing.
-Swifty Morgan
>Oh, and running is a doc too! ;)
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Some people just like cows
Ever have a great day?
Really? ME TOO
So today I got to herd cattle. Most people might consider this 'work' however I consider it VERY FUN.
The day started with a drive about an hour from home over to a ranch that a friend of mine's grandparents own. Once there we got to drive around in our jeep wrangler on some back trails around the fields. That jeep is one awesome fun to drive vehicle but drinks gasoline like I was a rich Saudi oilman with my own refinery. The superhero sidekick girlfriend even likes the jeep! She said it was 'fun to drive' and she definately looks great driving it.
For lunch we had a picnic on top of a huge hill with a cross at the top that is visible from the interstate. Wonderful weather and a picnic at the foot of the cross was a perfect day.
After lunch we drove around exploring some more and then went back to the house and got recruited to fix 'The Kubota'. Now Kubota is a brand, and not a specific piece of machinery but if you are wondering what I was working on it looks very similar to the picture:
The operator had decided that it was time to take one a challenge most cows never overcome....
BARBED WIRE FENCES
So in a last stand of blazing glory and potential for eternal victory over what most cattle know as an impassable boundry the Kubota revved its thousand cc's with all its might to plow down that fence that stood in the way between normalcy and eternal recognition and dignity as the little kubota that could. It huffed and it puffed and it knocked that fence down!
I know it knocked it down because most of the fence was all caught up under the drivetrain.
So with what tools were available we went to work to fix the kubota for the ranch owner.
I heard that he ran over the fence on accident. I wasn't there, but I think my more dramatic story will suffice for now.
Ever hear the phrase 'When all you have is a hammer every problem looks like a nail?'
Well for us it was 'When all you have is a hi-lift jack every problem looks too low'
or one that was most certainly true 'When all you have is a 5/8" socket everything is another size'
Anyway, finally got all the barbed wire out from under the kubota and found that it was time to herd cattle into the pen. In the movies people herd cattle from horseback, in 2011 people herd cattle from dodge trucks.
Lots of driving and honking but finally we got all those cows inside.
Overall a very fun day, we ate dinner at babes chicken dinner house which was great and made it home with light to spare.
-Swifty
Really? ME TOO
So today I got to herd cattle. Most people might consider this 'work' however I consider it VERY FUN.
The day started with a drive about an hour from home over to a ranch that a friend of mine's grandparents own. Once there we got to drive around in our jeep wrangler on some back trails around the fields. That jeep is one awesome fun to drive vehicle but drinks gasoline like I was a rich Saudi oilman with my own refinery. The superhero sidekick girlfriend even likes the jeep! She said it was 'fun to drive' and she definately looks great driving it.
For lunch we had a picnic on top of a huge hill with a cross at the top that is visible from the interstate. Wonderful weather and a picnic at the foot of the cross was a perfect day.
After lunch we drove around exploring some more and then went back to the house and got recruited to fix 'The Kubota'. Now Kubota is a brand, and not a specific piece of machinery but if you are wondering what I was working on it looks very similar to the picture:
The operator had decided that it was time to take one a challenge most cows never overcome....
BARBED WIRE FENCES
So in a last stand of blazing glory and potential for eternal victory over what most cattle know as an impassable boundry the Kubota revved its thousand cc's with all its might to plow down that fence that stood in the way between normalcy and eternal recognition and dignity as the little kubota that could. It huffed and it puffed and it knocked that fence down!
I know it knocked it down because most of the fence was all caught up under the drivetrain.
So with what tools were available we went to work to fix the kubota for the ranch owner.
I heard that he ran over the fence on accident. I wasn't there, but I think my more dramatic story will suffice for now.
Ever hear the phrase 'When all you have is a hammer every problem looks like a nail?'
Well for us it was 'When all you have is a hi-lift jack every problem looks too low'
or one that was most certainly true 'When all you have is a 5/8" socket everything is another size'
Anyway, finally got all the barbed wire out from under the kubota and found that it was time to herd cattle into the pen. In the movies people herd cattle from horseback, in 2011 people herd cattle from dodge trucks.
Lots of driving and honking but finally we got all those cows inside.
Overall a very fun day, we ate dinner at babes chicken dinner house which was great and made it home with light to spare.
-Swifty
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Long time no see?
Ok, I need to apologize, it has been crazy long since I have posted on here. Almost one month.
That is almost 1/12th of the year.
Too long.
Many exciting stories to share, but school has really been kicked up a notch lately. More tests and quizzes.
So as some of you may know I got the privilege to go visit New York City recently.
It was an awesome experience to say the least.
The superhero sidekick girlfriend that has been mentioned in posts before was going to play in Carnegie hall, and well the girlfriend's Grandmother, (Superhero Grandma) took me along to see the sidekick girlfriend play in NYC!
Thank you!
Want to hear a cool story from NYC? Yeah I guess so.
I stopped a runaway subway full of children from exploding into the statue of liberty thus protecting the future of America by saving the children and a national landmark that stands for democracy, freedom, and being buddies with french folks.
Just kidding. My trip was much more exciting than that made up story.
NYC is like a whole different land. It is like a gigantic concrete canyon that you never leave.
And what they say about NYC never sleeping is totally true. I was on the 14th floor of the hotel I stayed in and could hear traffic all night long. After the first night you grow used to it, and it is sorta soothing.
One of the cool parts of NYC was the food.
Dollar hot dog man! He sells hot dogs... for a dollar. That is like Quick Trip price down here. Way to go hot dog salesman. Even in rising economic times George Washington can still be traded for a hot dog.
Ray's pizza was great too. I thought it was very interesting how the sausage was sliced like pepperoni is normally. Made for some great pizza. And I went to an Alfredo's pizza next door to the hotel. The 'white pie' was really good. For those of you like me who had never heard of a white pie before it is basically just a cheese pizza with no sauce. I have no clue what kind of cheese but we will just refer to it as good cheese. I think that the white pie would have been FANTASTIC as cold breakfast pizza.
Looking for a good date idea?
Want to really impress a girl in NYC? Take her to times square late at night in the rain. Makes for quite the romantic stroll. If you are feeling super adventurous stop by the hard rock cafe and get the potato skins, but you have to try the sour cream. Guys: if you have never had sour cream before it will impress your girl a lot to try new foods. Trust me. And sour cream on potato skins tastes great. Overall being in times square at midnight in the light rain was super awesome.
One more thing before I have to get back to homework:
Are you bored on the plane? Like to draw?
Tomorrow on this very blog here I will feature some airplane art from some very talented artists!
-Swifty
That is almost 1/12th of the year.
Too long.
Many exciting stories to share, but school has really been kicked up a notch lately. More tests and quizzes.
So as some of you may know I got the privilege to go visit New York City recently.
It was an awesome experience to say the least.
The superhero sidekick girlfriend that has been mentioned in posts before was going to play in Carnegie hall, and well the girlfriend's Grandmother, (Superhero Grandma) took me along to see the sidekick girlfriend play in NYC!
Thank you!
Want to hear a cool story from NYC? Yeah I guess so.
I stopped a runaway subway full of children from exploding into the statue of liberty thus protecting the future of America by saving the children and a national landmark that stands for democracy, freedom, and being buddies with french folks.
Just kidding. My trip was much more exciting than that made up story.
NYC is like a whole different land. It is like a gigantic concrete canyon that you never leave.
And what they say about NYC never sleeping is totally true. I was on the 14th floor of the hotel I stayed in and could hear traffic all night long. After the first night you grow used to it, and it is sorta soothing.
One of the cool parts of NYC was the food.
Dollar hot dog man! He sells hot dogs... for a dollar. That is like Quick Trip price down here. Way to go hot dog salesman. Even in rising economic times George Washington can still be traded for a hot dog.
Ray's pizza was great too. I thought it was very interesting how the sausage was sliced like pepperoni is normally. Made for some great pizza. And I went to an Alfredo's pizza next door to the hotel. The 'white pie' was really good. For those of you like me who had never heard of a white pie before it is basically just a cheese pizza with no sauce. I have no clue what kind of cheese but we will just refer to it as good cheese. I think that the white pie would have been FANTASTIC as cold breakfast pizza.
Looking for a good date idea?
Want to really impress a girl in NYC? Take her to times square late at night in the rain. Makes for quite the romantic stroll. If you are feeling super adventurous stop by the hard rock cafe and get the potato skins, but you have to try the sour cream. Guys: if you have never had sour cream before it will impress your girl a lot to try new foods. Trust me. And sour cream on potato skins tastes great. Overall being in times square at midnight in the light rain was super awesome.
One more thing before I have to get back to homework:
Are you bored on the plane? Like to draw?
Tomorrow on this very blog here I will feature some airplane art from some very talented artists!
-Swifty
Monday, February 14, 2011
Monday Funday
My robot brain came in!
I spent 40 min waiting in line at the 'post office' to get it...
You may have noticed I put scare quotes around 'post office'. This is because the on campus 'post office' is not a post office. The cannot postmark items. The 'post office' is run more poorly than the real post office. I am not a fan of the USPS and think it is slow and inefficient but the on campus 'post office' is even slower. The on campus post office takes 2 days to get a package to the student. USPS said my package was delivered to campus at 9am Friday.
No package for me on Friday.
No package for me on Saturday.
No package for me at 12:45 today.
Finally got a package at 2:00.
And the line was 40 min long. I had nothing to do so I waited and got it.
The 'post office' claimed that it was the ice storm that closed campus for 4 days that caused the delay in packages.
The real USPS has a bit more pride in their timely deliveries.
While not the official creed of the USPS the famous
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds"
Quote is displayed at the James Farley Post Office in New York City.
So an ice storm 2 weeks ago can delay packages this much? Time to look for a new career mr. fake postman.
One last gripe about the 'post office'...
The person two people in front of me in line had her package given out to someone else. The 'postman' looked up who they gave it to and told this girl to find someone with the last name Delarosa. Yeah, just find any one of them... they must have your package. Sorry Mr. Postman but it is your fault you gave out the wrong package, quit trying to tell that girl to find it on her own.
Finally I got my package and as I was walking away the 'postman' yelled at me because I forgot to sign his little digital signature device. After waiting in line for 40 min I was in no mood to go back and help this guy get his job done. So how does Swifty Morgan sign his name? :)
That is it, I drew a smiley face.
Have a great day 'postman'! :)
I spent 40 min waiting in line at the 'post office' to get it...
You may have noticed I put scare quotes around 'post office'. This is because the on campus 'post office' is not a post office. The cannot postmark items. The 'post office' is run more poorly than the real post office. I am not a fan of the USPS and think it is slow and inefficient but the on campus 'post office' is even slower. The on campus post office takes 2 days to get a package to the student. USPS said my package was delivered to campus at 9am Friday.
No package for me on Friday.
No package for me on Saturday.
No package for me at 12:45 today.
Finally got a package at 2:00.
And the line was 40 min long. I had nothing to do so I waited and got it.
The 'post office' claimed that it was the ice storm that closed campus for 4 days that caused the delay in packages.
The real USPS has a bit more pride in their timely deliveries.
While not the official creed of the USPS the famous
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds"
Quote is displayed at the James Farley Post Office in New York City.
So an ice storm 2 weeks ago can delay packages this much? Time to look for a new career mr. fake postman.
One last gripe about the 'post office'...
The person two people in front of me in line had her package given out to someone else. The 'postman' looked up who they gave it to and told this girl to find someone with the last name Delarosa. Yeah, just find any one of them... they must have your package. Sorry Mr. Postman but it is your fault you gave out the wrong package, quit trying to tell that girl to find it on her own.
Finally I got my package and as I was walking away the 'postman' yelled at me because I forgot to sign his little digital signature device. After waiting in line for 40 min I was in no mood to go back and help this guy get his job done. So how does Swifty Morgan sign his name? :)
That is it, I drew a smiley face.
Have a great day 'postman'! :)
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Valentines Dinner
Howdy all,
I know it has been a long time since I blogged last, school and work have been busy.
Today I took my superhero girlfriend out to dinner in our hometown. I decided to blindfold her and drive her around a bit on our way to dinner, and she still guessed exactly where we were eating! Some sort of crazy internal gps like super-sense going on there.
Anyway we went out to eat at a local Italian eatery, one that we frequent quite often. Neither of us had been in a while because we are both off at school. Went in and got a seat instantly which was great. And guess who are waiter was? George! The SAME waiter that we had when we first went to lunch at that location about three and a half years ago. Talk about setting up the perfect date. Took my girl to the same place, same waiter. And the food was fast and pretty good too. Just to be fun we left a little note for George on the back of our receipt. Who knows if he will read it or even care, but we thought it was cool.
After that dinner we went back to her house to make cookies and watch a movie.
All in all a great night!
Happy Valentines day,
-Swifty Morgan
I know it has been a long time since I blogged last, school and work have been busy.
Today I took my superhero girlfriend out to dinner in our hometown. I decided to blindfold her and drive her around a bit on our way to dinner, and she still guessed exactly where we were eating! Some sort of crazy internal gps like super-sense going on there.
Anyway we went out to eat at a local Italian eatery, one that we frequent quite often. Neither of us had been in a while because we are both off at school. Went in and got a seat instantly which was great. And guess who are waiter was? George! The SAME waiter that we had when we first went to lunch at that location about three and a half years ago. Talk about setting up the perfect date. Took my girl to the same place, same waiter. And the food was fast and pretty good too. Just to be fun we left a little note for George on the back of our receipt. Who knows if he will read it or even care, but we thought it was cool.
After that dinner we went back to her house to make cookies and watch a movie.
All in all a great night!
Happy Valentines day,
-Swifty Morgan
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Wednesday Snow day #2
Live from ________ Hall at _______University this is Swifty Morgan reporting about snow day numero dos.
It is a Wednesday. Normally on Wednesdays I have my environmental science lab. I didn't today. That means that I still do not know who my instructor is for that course. The first two weeks my instructor was stuck in Chili because the airline went on strike. Now we have no class, hopefully soon I will know who all my teachers are.
This morning I worked extra desk hours. That is great because in the end it means extra $$ which means. I might get another penny per quarter return from my savings account! Living the Dream!
Before my desk shift I walked to 7-11 to get some coffee. At 6:30 the power company decided that the part of town that 7-11 is on was ready for a rolling blackout and power shut off. Luckily I was using my spare change to pay for coffee and had 11 dimes to pay. The 7-11 man told me not to worry about it, but I like 7-11 they are a good place right by campus. The guy that works at 7-11 worries me though, if I were his manager he would be fired ASAP. When I was there there were two of us in the store. And the other customer spilled his coffee. I guess he was so excited about warm drinks. Anyway the night shift 7-11 man said 'Don't worry about it, Day shift starts in an hour, I will have them clean it up'.... let coffee sit on the floor and the counter for an hour because you are too lazy to clean? As I have been told Ray Kroc of McDonalds once said 'If you have time enough to lean, you have time enough to clean' Adios Mr. 7-11 man.
7am to 12pm is a long time to sit at a computer and figure out what to do.
@ 7 am I started by watching an episode of Southland (a super cool tv show) on TNT.tv
@ 8 am I went on vacation. Sorta. I have a lot of fun looking a google maps. And lately street view has been covering more and more places. I was looking at street view of Big Bend National Park in west Texas. Very fun road trip, lots of mouse clicking, but at least you don't pay gas.
After I toured around Big Bend via satellite I jumped across the river to Juarez Mexico. That town has really grown since the last time I was there. It has almost been 3 years but there is quite the improvement to their roads and buildings.
Next I went to Santa Fe New Mexico. Drove around the square and never had to stop for a light! Google maps vacations are fun and free!
That actually entertained me for almost 4 hours.
After desk I went to Suko Thai for some food. Spicy Thai chicken wings? No problem, I am a native Texan. Spicy is GOOD!
Spent the rest of the day doing homework, what fun!
It is a Wednesday. Normally on Wednesdays I have my environmental science lab. I didn't today. That means that I still do not know who my instructor is for that course. The first two weeks my instructor was stuck in Chili because the airline went on strike. Now we have no class, hopefully soon I will know who all my teachers are.
This morning I worked extra desk hours. That is great because in the end it means extra $$ which means. I might get another penny per quarter return from my savings account! Living the Dream!
Before my desk shift I walked to 7-11 to get some coffee. At 6:30 the power company decided that the part of town that 7-11 is on was ready for a rolling blackout and power shut off. Luckily I was using my spare change to pay for coffee and had 11 dimes to pay. The 7-11 man told me not to worry about it, but I like 7-11 they are a good place right by campus. The guy that works at 7-11 worries me though, if I were his manager he would be fired ASAP. When I was there there were two of us in the store. And the other customer spilled his coffee. I guess he was so excited about warm drinks. Anyway the night shift 7-11 man said 'Don't worry about it, Day shift starts in an hour, I will have them clean it up'.... let coffee sit on the floor and the counter for an hour because you are too lazy to clean? As I have been told Ray Kroc of McDonalds once said 'If you have time enough to lean, you have time enough to clean' Adios Mr. 7-11 man.
7am to 12pm is a long time to sit at a computer and figure out what to do.
@ 7 am I started by watching an episode of Southland (a super cool tv show) on TNT.tv
@ 8 am I went on vacation. Sorta. I have a lot of fun looking a google maps. And lately street view has been covering more and more places. I was looking at street view of Big Bend National Park in west Texas. Very fun road trip, lots of mouse clicking, but at least you don't pay gas.
After I toured around Big Bend via satellite I jumped across the river to Juarez Mexico. That town has really grown since the last time I was there. It has almost been 3 years but there is quite the improvement to their roads and buildings.
Next I went to Santa Fe New Mexico. Drove around the square and never had to stop for a light! Google maps vacations are fun and free!
That actually entertained me for almost 4 hours.
After desk I went to Suko Thai for some food. Spicy Thai chicken wings? No problem, I am a native Texan. Spicy is GOOD!
Spent the rest of the day doing homework, what fun!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Tuesday Snow Day #1
I heard my phone chime and the hall erupted with cheers.
No I was not in some great hall full of stock brokers and my phone did not deliver a text about the closing price of the DOW 500.... I was in my room, and the residents on my floor went nuts when my university canceled Tuesday classes. I am not sure if any of them slept at all, Tuesday morning was very quite and peaceful. I woke up early to go take pictures of snow before it was trampled on and got some neat pictures of campus. Those of you with access to my facebook may see them there. For those of you that do not and probably will not ever have access to my pictures on facebook take out a blank sheet of computer paper. Now set it on the floor. Ok, good job! That is what the ground looked like! It was white.
Ok enough of that. My residents spent most the day inside the building playing computer games, watching movies, and playing ping pong. I studied fairly regularly because I do not want to be behind in my classes anytime soon.
Tuesday at about 5 pm it got really loud again. This time I knew it was coming because university employees got an email minutes before students got their text messages. I was downstairs in the 'common room' and people started running around yelling and shouting cheers of joy... problem, if they are THIS excited to miss a day of school, they might be getting in a lot of trouble stuck in the building for two days.
So here is to keeping the peace in the building. For those of you at other colleges enjoy your time off too (if you got any).
No I was not in some great hall full of stock brokers and my phone did not deliver a text about the closing price of the DOW 500.... I was in my room, and the residents on my floor went nuts when my university canceled Tuesday classes. I am not sure if any of them slept at all, Tuesday morning was very quite and peaceful. I woke up early to go take pictures of snow before it was trampled on and got some neat pictures of campus. Those of you with access to my facebook may see them there. For those of you that do not and probably will not ever have access to my pictures on facebook take out a blank sheet of computer paper. Now set it on the floor. Ok, good job! That is what the ground looked like! It was white.
Ok enough of that. My residents spent most the day inside the building playing computer games, watching movies, and playing ping pong. I studied fairly regularly because I do not want to be behind in my classes anytime soon.
Tuesday at about 5 pm it got really loud again. This time I knew it was coming because university employees got an email minutes before students got their text messages. I was downstairs in the 'common room' and people started running around yelling and shouting cheers of joy... problem, if they are THIS excited to miss a day of school, they might be getting in a lot of trouble stuck in the building for two days.
So here is to keeping the peace in the building. For those of you at other colleges enjoy your time off too (if you got any).
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